Have you ever met someone just once in your life, yet they continue to be in your life because of how well you clicked with him or her? That's how I feel about this super cool gal, Eve. We met in Prague, continued to stay in contact through each others' blogs and Facebook. DO check out her lovely blog Pleine de Vie because it contains great stories, fashion advice, quirky recaps, and all things delightful. Today, Eve is going to talk to you about how to maintain a healthy long distance relationship by using three clever tips ( FYI: can also be applied to close distance relationships too)!
I met Cathy at a hostel we stayed at in Prague way back in January. It's nice to overhear American accents when you've been living abroad for so long (it had been four months for me by then), so on top of that, hearing Cathy's bubbly, upbeat voice caught my attention right away. Soon enough, a group of us girls were out grabbing a glass of wine or two, getting to know one another while attempting to stay out of the bitter cold.
A very important part of our lives came up in the conversation right away: our boyfriends back at home in the States. Amazingly enough, three of us girls were in the same situation. Some newer relationships, some older, but long-distance love nonetheless. I was asked when we were apart, and asked even now that we're reunited: "HOW do you guys do it??"
It's REALLY difficult. Really difficult, I say. But not impossible.
Communication is key in any relationship, which is why it makes it so rough being so far apart. When your significant other is not physically there to catch up with, to vent to, to hear about your day, etc. we are forced to resort to phone calls, texts, emails. But how hard is it to hash out problems without working and feeding off of facial expressions, body language, real tears, real laughter? (Add to that a nine-hour time difference, in my case.)
There are some things you just can't control. But taken what you're given, you can find creative, extremely simple ways to keep the love intact regardless of the miles that separate you. My examples will revolve around emails, because that was the best way that worked for us. My classmate and her boyfriend wrote letters, (super romantic, right?) but it didn't really reflect my boyfriend's style, which I was totally okay with. Depending on what your distance allows, you can replace it with whatever mode best suits your relationship.
OK, here's the game. Daily emails, addressing at LEAST the following three questions (and rules? No rules, get as random as you'd like):
1.) Pits and Peaks. I found that it was really hard to get a good idea of what was going on in each other's day to day lives, those moment to moment details. These are the details that bring us closer, and missing out was really hard. By the time we were able to talk, they were either forgotten or seemingly irrelevant. Thus, my pits and peaks suggestion. Every day, document the day's pit (worst) and peak (best) moments. It was a great way to sort of jog our memories as to what took place in our day.
2.) "Remember when..."
From first date jitters, to the day he saw you off at the airport. From embarrassing shared experiences to never-before-exposed thoughts you had during moments spent together. Reminiscing on events and memories spent has always invoked such positive feelings for me, and in reliving those moments together it can bring unexpected bursts of happiness to your day.
3.) "I love you because..."
I saw this idea on Pinterest and loved it right away. Stating why you love the person every day -- no matter how small or meaningless it may seem -- is definitely a way to reaffirm to one another, especially in a long distance relationship, that that person is worth sacrificing the time apart for. Not only that, but sometimes we tend to just get comfortable and assume that the other person knows how we feel. But it never hurts to remind the people in your life why you love them. I think it's a great thing to do with everyone in your life, regardless of how far away they are. Shoot, I want one of these in my house when I'm married. Those words just don't ever wear out. And you find that the reasons why you do seem endless.
And that's it! Told you it was easy. There are so many other ways you can go about it, too. Use these three simple questions. Add more. Make your own list of questions. You know what works for you. I have found that it has been the little things -- the little gestures, the short emails, the brief flashbacks from memories -- that have struck a chord in me more than anything else. I received the simplest Valentines Day card in the mail and wanted to bawl my eyes out, it made me so happy (contradictory, yes, but that's me). So run with it, get creative. And don't let anyone tell you that you can't make it work. Oh, and how did people ever survive without Skype??
Last pic source: http://pinterest.com/pin/
I met Cathy at a hostel we stayed at in Prague way back in January. It's nice to overhear American accents when you've been living abroad for so long (it had been four months for me by then), so on top of that, hearing Cathy's bubbly, upbeat voice caught my attention right away. Soon enough, a group of us girls were out grabbing a glass of wine or two, getting to know one another while attempting to stay out of the bitter cold.
A very important part of our lives came up in the conversation right away: our boyfriends back at home in the States. Amazingly enough, three of us girls were in the same situation. Some newer relationships, some older, but long-distance love nonetheless. I was asked when we were apart, and asked even now that we're reunited: "HOW do you guys do it??"
It's REALLY difficult. Really difficult, I say. But not impossible.
Communication is key in any relationship, which is why it makes it so rough being so far apart. When your significant other is not physically there to catch up with, to vent to, to hear about your day, etc. we are forced to resort to phone calls, texts, emails. But how hard is it to hash out problems without working and feeding off of facial expressions, body language, real tears, real laughter? (Add to that a nine-hour time difference, in my case.)
There are some things you just can't control. But taken what you're given, you can find creative, extremely simple ways to keep the love intact regardless of the miles that separate you. My examples will revolve around emails, because that was the best way that worked for us. My classmate and her boyfriend wrote letters, (super romantic, right?) but it didn't really reflect my boyfriend's style, which I was totally okay with. Depending on what your distance allows, you can replace it with whatever mode best suits your relationship.
OK, here's the game. Daily emails, addressing at LEAST the following three questions (and rules? No rules, get as random as you'd like):1.) Pits and Peaks. I found that it was really hard to get a good idea of what was going on in each other's day to day lives, those moment to moment details. These are the details that bring us closer, and missing out was really hard. By the time we were able to talk, they were either forgotten or seemingly irrelevant. Thus, my pits and peaks suggestion. Every day, document the day's pit (worst) and peak (best) moments. It was a great way to sort of jog our memories as to what took place in our day.
2.) "Remember when..."
From first date jitters, to the day he saw you off at the airport. From embarrassing shared experiences to never-before-exposed thoughts you had during moments spent together. Reminiscing on events and memories spent has always invoked such positive feelings for me, and in reliving those moments together it can bring unexpected bursts of happiness to your day.
3.) "I love you because..."
I saw this idea on Pinterest and loved it right away. Stating why you love the person every day -- no matter how small or meaningless it may seem -- is definitely a way to reaffirm to one another, especially in a long distance relationship, that that person is worth sacrificing the time apart for. Not only that, but sometimes we tend to just get comfortable and assume that the other person knows how we feel. But it never hurts to remind the people in your life why you love them. I think it's a great thing to do with everyone in your life, regardless of how far away they are. Shoot, I want one of these in my house when I'm married. Those words just don't ever wear out. And you find that the reasons why you do seem endless.
And that's it! Told you it was easy. There are so many other ways you can go about it, too. Use these three simple questions. Add more. Make your own list of questions. You know what works for you. I have found that it has been the little things -- the little gestures, the short emails, the brief flashbacks from memories -- that have struck a chord in me more than anything else. I received the simplest Valentines Day card in the mail and wanted to bawl my eyes out, it made me so happy (contradictory, yes, but that's me). So run with it, get creative. And don't let anyone tell you that you can't make it work. Oh, and how did people ever survive without Skype??
Last pic source: http://pinterest.com/pin/
awww, this was great!! good tips.
ReplyDeleteThank you! My friend Evelyn is a fantastic writer and it was an honor to have her share some tips with everyone :)
ReplyDelete